Construct Stronger
Sentences
By Beth Ann Erickson,
FilbertPublishing.com
Today we’re continuing with yesterday’s
entry.
You already know that you need to avoid “etre” (or “to be”
verbs.) But there are other ways you can
make your writing stronger, tighter, and leaner.
You see, strong sentences are specific
sentences. Ultra-specific, to be exact.
Remember our first sentence we improved
before? Just to refresh your memory, here it
is: “The car is hot.”
Then we improved the verb “is” by writing, “The Chevy felt
like a furnace.”
Yeah, the verb is stronger because “Felt” is stronger than
“Is.” But we also added some ultra specific
words like “Chevy” instead of “Car” and “Furnace” instead of
“Hot.”
Whenever you are able to use a more
specific term the stronger your sentence will be.
Let’s look at the second sentence: “That dog is
loud.”
Here’s how we changed it: “The Rotweiler’s wail pierced the
subway terminal like a bullet from a .22 rifle.”
Again, look at our ultra specific words: “Rotweiler” instead
of “Dog.” “Loud” versus “pierced the subway
terminal like a bullet from a .22 rifle.”
This is an important lesson to learn because as a writer,
your job is to transmit your thought into your reader’s mind as
fully intact as possible. If you’re “seeing” a red car, your
reader really ought to see the same “red car” as you are. You
do this by using ultra-specific terms.
“Red car” can conjure almost any image whereas a “cherry-red
Geo Metro Coupe” will not only create a vivid image, it has the
added bonus of allowing the reader to make some assumptions
about the owner of the car.
Now review your writing. Your verbs
should already be active. Review every
sentence to make sure you’re using as many ultra-specific terms
as possible. Have fun.
This is where you get to make your words shine.
~~~
Beth Ann Erickson is Queen Bee of Filbert Publishing
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